In 2015, my life sucked so much that I wanted to die.
I had zero money, zero friends, and zero hope.
But a strange idea crossed my mind.
“What if I die today and when I pass to the other life, an angel is waiting for me. And put me like in the cinema the film of the life I was supposed to live, but I didn’t because I didn’t try enough.
What if this is all a movie, and I’m in the part when the hero’s life sucks.
What if there is no easy road to success, and all the pain I experienced was necessary to become a new me.”
And after that, I decided to be my hero.
I’m not kidding you.
I did two things.
I stopped blaming people for my errors.
And I started every day looking at myself in the mirror and repeating at loud the same speech.
Sorry, I’m too busy.
Marcus Aurelius used to say, “Begin each day by saying to yourself; Today I will meet with interference, ingratitude, insolence, disloyalty, ill will, and selfishness.”
I upgraded it a little bit the speech. And I start my days by saying,
Today, if negativity knocks on my door, I will say, “sorry, I’m too busy.”
If someone tries to argue with me and drain my energy, I will say, “sorry, I’m too busy.”
If I receive a call, an email, or even a damn Whatsapp, with plans that steal my time, I will say, “sorry, I’m too busy.”
And I have continued to do so to this day because I’m the hero of my life.
And you can do it too.
Suppose you find yourself in the same place as me in 2015. And you feel like life is smothering you.
If you feel the world is unfair to you.
If no one takes you seriously.
If no one bets on you.
If you feel like a shipwrecked person asking for help, everyone pretends not to see or hear.
Then take this unsexy advice: Become your father.
The ultimate life hack: become your dad.
Think about it: your father could be someone with twenty years more than you. Pretend that guy is inside your head. Pretend that person is the guy you would like to be when you grow up.
Why? Because if there is someone in this world who can tell you, “keep calm, all it will be ok,” si that guy.
I know that I sound crazy. But I am not the only one who uses this technique.
Matthew McConaughey, in 2014, at the Oscars, said something like,
“When I was 15 years old, a very important person in my life came up to me and said, “Who is your hero?”. And I told him it’s me ten years from now. When I was 25 years old, the same person asked me, “Who is your hero?” and I said it’s me ten years from now. That’s how I live every day, chasing my hero, who lives ten years away. I’ll never get over it, but that’s ok with me because it keeps me with someone to keep chasing.”
You can join our club. And start chasing your hero right now.
If you try, things will get better.
You have to connect with that guy: your hero; your father; your future you, and you have to become friends. You need to speak with him every day.
I know, it sounds mad. But look around: you are alone.
But if you start speaking to your future self and acting and behaving as he would, if you listen to his advice, then you are not alone anymore. You will be a part of a team.
But if you want this cooperation to work and your “future you” show you the way out of the hole you need to want it. As Ryan Holiday said,
“To get good at what you do, you have to be driven, and you have to be self-driven. You don’t become great because the coach wants it’s for you; you have to want it more than the coach wants.”
The question now is.
How bad do you want it?